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Who Controls Your Happiness?



This year has kept its theme of change and it seems that change truly is our only constant thus far in 2016.  I am sloooowwwly adjusting to it and feel like I am just rounding a corner to take life by the horns again.  It's taken much longer than I ever thought it would and may take more work that originally thought too; but one thing is for sure, God is in all of it.  He's showing up more and more in our life this year than in years past and I am so incredibly grateful for that!
Today, I want to share with you a hard realization that came last week in the midst of my youngest turning 3 and my husband being out of town.  It was a rough start to the week and it seemed as if everything around me was failing.  But then a friend said something so simple yet so powerful and it stuck; changing my perspective of where I'm at in my journey and the purpose of my position.  I wrote this out while sitting at Chic-Fil-a watching the boys play tag with their friends (I was actually by myself but anyone inside the play area is considered their "friends").


In the past few weeks, I have realized that I've let the decisions of others affect my happiness.  Those decisions are all ones I would have made too if it were me in their shoes but none the less I internalized my feeling and let stress take a toll.

Anxiety of change has rocked my world lately and it all came to a head this week when I experienced two panic attacks.  I had some tightness in my chest and felt my breathing was anything but normal.  I tell y'all this because I feel its important to be transparent.  My journey of mom-ing and living a healthy lifestyle is not just selfies and smiles all the time; sometimes life can be challenging and down right hard.  A friend told me that day in the midst of my panic that only I am the only one that will be affected by my actions and decisions (in the sense that I shouldn't let other people's decisions rob me of  ambition and motivation).  This seems to be a no-brainer but I had victimized myself so much that, to me, it was all everyone else's fault.
It was their fault that I am not setting goals for myself and accomplishing them.  It was their fault that I have not reached goals that I had set for myself and family.  It was their fault that I was upset and in a funk.  It sounds absolutely absurd as I type it out but my frustration was real.
However, that day my friend told me- Nicole, YOU make the decisions for YOUR life and YOU are the only one that deals with the consequences of those decisions.  So if a clean house makes you happy- then you do it for you.  When you choose to eat something- the ONLY person affected by the consequences of that choice is you.  It isn't going to be the person to the left or to the right of you.

Don't get me wrong, things are still chaotic;however, I have adjusted my perspective and have a brighter outlook on the current circumstances.

So no matter where you are, if things are good or not so good- remember neither the person to your right or left can live your life for you.

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